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Post by x-esque on Sept 21, 2006 13:45:15 GMT -5
2) Funnily enough, half my family is from Ireland, so I've been there many, many times. I used to go once every summer when I was younger, to my grandparents' farm. They live in the Republic or Ireland, out in the countryside, so it's very pretty and unspoilt. One of my favourite memories is being out in my grandma's garden in mid-summer, catching butterfiles with my cousins. We also used to have a hideout, in one of the fields, which was a little copse of trees that we called "The Grove", we'd go up there and find treasure of hunt ghosts and plan our plans. It was a really nice place. Ooooh, I love your description of the time you spent in the countryside; that sounds wonderful. Ghost hunting! Very Supernatural 1) If you believe in ghosts, do you get freaked out by them, or just the thought of them? 2) What is the grossest or most unnerving demon (or villian) on BTVS or Angel? (Whatever pops in your mind first). 3) What is the last comedy movie that you saw? 4) What's for dinner? thanks.
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 22, 2006 1:14:41 GMT -5
Hey AngelAficionado! Some questions for ya: 1-Where do you live in England? ( Sorry but I haven't had the time to read all of your HotSeat!) 2-Have you travel more outside of your country or within the UK? Depending on your answer, which country would you like to visit ? 3-Have you been to France? 4-What do you think of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie ( I can not stand them) 5-I have heard of an english gay hip-hop singer ( don't remember his name though). Do you know who I am talking about? if so, do you like his music? 6-I am a foreigner living in the US, and I appreciated your comment on Janet Jackson's incident at the Superbowl. How do you think English citizens would have reacted if it had happened in UK? I would think they'd be amused more than shocked, but that is a guess. 7-What was your reaction when Joyce died in season 5? 8- according to you, what is happiness? 9- Do you like marmite (Sorry, but I don't tthe spelling of it!)? 10- What is your favorite part of England? 1. I live in the wonderfully disturbing and odd town of Royal Tunbridge Wells, which is in Kent. It's a spa town, and was founded because the royal family used to like coming here to paddle in the water of some kind of spring. Here's a little more information on it: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tunbridge_Wells2. I definitely travelled more outside of the UK, there's not many places within my own country that are of interest to me. London is probably about the only place I ever have a real desire to visit, so I do that a lot. I've been to the USA, Jamaica, Thailand, the Canaries, Kos, mainland Greece, the Republic of Ireland, Menorca and Spain. Oh and France I think next on my list is definitely Australia, New Zealand, Japan, Canada and more of the USA. 3. Yes! But it was only for a day, I went over to Calais on the ferry to do some shopping for wines and cheeses and stuff. I'd love to go back though and see it properly. Paris really attracts me. I always wanted to see the Eiffel Tower and take a tour of the Paris sewer systems, maybe visit Notre Dame too. I'd also love to eat lunch in a Parisian cafe, I think I might gorge myself on French pastries though! Now I'm hungry for a pain au chocolat! 4. Ugh I can't stand them either. I don't mind Nicole as much as Paris, because she's got a sense of humour and can be quite funny at times. But Paris is just so emotionless and dull. She's famous for absolutely no reason other than she has a lot of money and goes to a lot of parties. Now she has that fame, she's using it as a shortcut to making music and starring in TV shows and stuff, which other people have to struggle for, sometimes for half their lives! 5. Oh I have heard of him, I think. I remember seeing him on a television documentary but I couldn't tell you his name if I wanted to. I've never listened to his music, but then, I'm not a huge hip-hop fan anyway so I probably wouldn't like his stuff. 6. Thank you, I'm glad you appreciated that. I think if that had happened in the UK, people would have found it hilarious! It would have been all over the tabloids for a week or so, and then everyone would have forgotten it. Maybe a few old ladies might have been offended, but that would be about the extent of it. I think England (and Europe in general) just has a racier sense of humour, we have stuff like that on primetime TV every week! I remember on one chat show, they played a game where men wore kilts and danced over an air vent, and when the music stopped, the vent would blow up their kilts to reveal whether they had underwear on or not. People were placing bets on which man had no underpants on! No-one got angry about that and it was on during primetime televison. Our censors are far more relaxed too, for instance, in the UK you can now say "shit" and "fuck" on 4 o'clock television, as long as it's not gratuitous. 7. Oh I was so sad. That whole episode was very painful to watch for me because I lost my Dad when I was about 7 years old. The part where Buffy tells Dawn hit very close to home for me, I remember what it was like coming home from school and having my mother take me into another room and explain what had happened. Joyce had become such a part of the regular cast of the show and I'd really grown to love her character over the last few years. For all her mistakes and denial, she really was lovely. It also felt strange because she reminds me a lot of my own mother. Physically they look somewhat alike, so I had a lot of subconscious association with Joyce. I felt very close to her. To see her all pale and blue was heart-wrenching, then seeing her being zipped into the body bag, and on the exam table and finally in the morgue after her biopsy. At several points I had to pause the video, leave the room to cry a little and then calm myself down with some water. I love "The Body" as an episode, but it's very upsetting to watch. 8. My idea of happiness is that, it can be anything free of fear and opression and anxiety. You don't need specific things to be happy, it's something very personal to each person. I think, the exact feeling of happiness, to me, is this little feeling I get in my chest and stomach, where it feels like my heart is rising and my stomach is full of good butterflies, not nervous ones. I also get the uncontrollable urge to smile, even if I don't know I'm doing it. The things that make me happy are passion, silliness, friendship, sunshine, freedom, accomplishments, sex, art, film, good food, very good music and of course, Buffy! 9. My friend told me I'm probably the only person in the world who "doesn't mind" Marmite (you spelled it right, by the way ). Everyone is supposed to either love it or hate it, with no middle ground. I just don't have much of an opinion either way. If it's provided on toast or something, I'll eat it without complaint and enjoy the taste, but I don't rate it as one of my "top tastes". I wouldn't make sure to have some in my kitchen at all times. 10. Hmm. I would say, while I love London and all the fun you can have there, I will always love Kent, where I've lived since I was three. It's so picturesque and safe. There's not a huge crime rate. It's full of greenery, so much so that they call it "The Garden of England". I was talking to my friends the other day, and I said something like "I know we sometimes complain about Tunbridge Wells being boring and crappy, but you know, I don't think I would have wanted to grow up anywhere else in the UK". We all agreed. In my town, it's still safe for me to walk around alone after dark, I always walk home from the bars at night, and that's a good 25-35 minute walk in near complete darkness. Anywhere else that would be really stupid to do, but here it's fine. My friends always joke that I live on Wisteria Lane, from Desperate Housewives, because the street (and the area) I live in look very similar to it, it's very neat and pretty. I like that I'm in a close proximity to a lot of things too, I'm only an hour's train ride from London, and a short drive from three different beaches and coastal towns. So yes, I'd say my favourite pat of England is the place I live right now! Thanks for the questions!
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 22, 2006 1:50:57 GMT -5
Ooooh, I love your description of the time you spent in the countryside; that sounds wonderful. Ghost hunting! Very Supernatural LOL Thank you! Yes, back in those days I was quite the mini-Dean Winchester! I even had a shotgun! (Well, it was a piece of wood, but in my MIND it was a shotgun) 1) If you believe in ghosts, do you get freaked out by them, or just the thought of them? 2) What is the grossest or most unnerving demon (or villian) on BTVS or Angel? (Whatever pops in your mind first). 3) What is the last comedy movie that you saw? 4) What's for dinner? thanks. 1. I don't think I really believe in ghosts anymore. The older I get, the less superstitious I become. When I was younger I used to just believe in everything, vampires, ghosts, witches...all of it! But I think that came from spending too much time over in Ireland. My family are Roman Catholic, so there was always warnings to watch out for the Devil and stuff like that, which me and my cousins would take very literally. But now I'm older I just think "It's just completely impossible", because, in my eyes, when you die, that's the end. No afterlife or purgatory or unfinished business. I think a lot of that stuff is human creation, designed to comfort ourselves over our lack of knowledge about death. However, if they do exist, I'd be a little freaked out, especially if I saw one of those noisy ghosts who rail and scream in those raspy inhuman voices. You know, the ones that sound like a cat's scream? Those really creep me out. I don't think I'd want to see a Japanese hungry ghost either. I saw an illustration of one in this drawing book I had, when I was around 8. It terrified the life out of me. And what worried me more, was that the little cross I wore wouldn't protect me against a Japanese ghost because they believe in Shintoism! 2. When I first started watching the show, I was terrified of Darla's vampface, but then she got staked, so I was free of that menace. I HATED Darryl Epps, in fact I taped over my recording of "Some Assembly Required" because the whole thing scared the crap out of me. I don't dig zombies, at all. I remember when Cordy pulled the hand out of her skirt, I was nearly sick, then moreso when she started freaking out because there were PARTS with her in the dumpster, including the girls' heads. Hated mummified Ampata, when she first just appeared from behind a bus and killed the exchange student, I nearly had a nervous breakdown. (Bear in mind, when seasons 1 and 2 aired, I was still 10-11 years old) I didn't like the zombies in Dead Man's Party, I couldn't watch that episode again for a good long while. Oddly though, I didn't mind the zombies in "The Zeppo" except for Parker (the one who had the run-in with the mailbox) he was just too decomposed to be likeable. Season four, I think the only thing I found scary (aside from obviously, the Gentlemen) was "Fear, Itself", because there was that guy with the broken neck, talking in the basment, and those zombies that started trying to pull Buffy down. Those were disgusting. Buffy's hair also frightened me several times that season, I didn't enjoy the crimped look Season five, that little Queller bitch demon. It was revolting. I hated how it would sit above you and then jump on you. Ugh and how fast it was along the floow, scuttling around. I know it looked a little goofy, but it still scared me. Zombie Joyce was so scary, I was terrfied we'd have to see her face. Seeing her feet walking shakily along the ground and her shadow on the window was MORE than enough for me. Season six, decomposed Buffy was awful, thankfully brief too. The demon in "Afterlife" was scary to me, when it was pretending to be Buffy and screaming about stabbing the fawn. Buffy scared me sometimes that season too, I didn't know how far she was going to go over the edge. Season seven, The First just creeped me out the whole time, Caleb scared me, the Ubervamp scared me. The stakes just seemed that much higher in the last year. Gnarl fell flat for me though, I never found him as creepy as some people make out. Angel, not much was scary to me. I'd say the doctor with the floating eye creeped me out, Wes was scary in "Billy". Evil Cordy terrfied me in "Inside Out", the Beast was scary in "Habeas Corpses", as were all those icky zombies. The zombie-ghost-things in "Hellbound" were not fun either. That one cutting off his fingers made me sick. Me and my sister should not have watched that alone in the house, at night, with the lights off. 3. I think the last comedy I saw for like, the first time was "Ms Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous", which wasn't that great in my opinion. It was fun, but nowhere near as good as the first. The last comedy I watched that I've seen before was, I think, Mean Girls. I can never get tired of that film. 4. Oh I have no idea! Last night I had stir fried vegetables with chicken and rice noodles. Tonight will probably be a surprise. (Or, if I go out on the town, a late night burger to quell the munchies)
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bloodyfrenchy
Potential Slayer
I am so ready to kick your demon @$$
Posts: 483
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Post by bloodyfrenchy on Sept 22, 2006 16:36:11 GMT -5
AngelAficionado,
Thank you for the answers you provided to satisfy my curiosity!
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Post by stakey on Sept 22, 2006 16:50:34 GMT -5
1.Being a fellow brit and having to put up with the stupid wannabee trendy people...who do you hate more.....
Chavs or Emos?
2. Seeing as we are both season 7 fans....which is your second favourite season....better yet....give the order fav first of the seasons.
3. Same for angel....
4. What do you think about under age drinking...as I know its a big problem here in britain? Did you ever do did. (Im pretty sure your 18 or over....) And if you are 18....do you drink or disagree with it...if so why?
5. are you a myspace whore or do you not have one?
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Post by The Second Evil on Sept 23, 2006 6:06:36 GMT -5
I have more!
1) You are randomly given a voucher for Plastic Surgery. You have to have one proceedure, and 'nothing' or dental work is not an option. What do you go for?
2) Most embarassing CD you own?
3) Are there any celebrities, that you can imagine being really arrogant and nasty in real life?
4) Do you think Britney will make a successful comeback or do you think too much has happened for her to be that popular again?
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 23, 2006 10:42:40 GMT -5
1.Being a fellow brit and having to put up with the stupid wannabee trendy people...who do you hate more..... Chavs or Emos? 2. Seeing as we are both season 7 fans....which is your second favourite season....better yet....give the order fav first of the seasons. 3. Same for angel.... 4. What do you think about under age drinking...as I know its a big problem here in britain? Did you ever do did. (Im pretty sure your 18 or over....) And if you are 18....do you drink or disagree with it...if so why? 5. are you a myspace whore or do you not have one? 1. I'm surprised I'm actually saying this, but emos annoy me much muc much more than chavs do. Chavs are alright if they're in a good mood. I've found most of them can be pretty funny and a bit of a laugh in the right social situation. They do annoy me when they hang around in huge groups and scream things at people, but a good way to deal with that is to make some kind of obscene joke back and they end up saying stuff like "Yeah you're alright, he's alright". Emos just..ugh, I can't deal with all the self-pity and the bad music and the ugly, ugly hairstyles and clothing. I hate this faux-individuality too, when really all they're doing is conforming to another set of rules. It's so infuriating. I hate how a large amount of them will be like "Oh God, my life is so hard, pity me, I have such insight into pain", I just want to shake them and tell them they have no idea how rough life can be. Their idea of a "problem" is their parents telling them to wear something normal and wipe that shit off of their faces. Everyone's parents clash with them over their clothing sometimes, or their music choices, that's just how it is, it does NOT mean you should run around whining and crying and filling up MySpace with endless bulletins about "your pain" or how you nearly cut yourself again today. Bloody emos! 2. Okay, my fave seasons go in this order: 7 6 2 4 3 5 1 I don't gel so much with the "easy" seasons, like 3 and 5, they just sorta seem like "standard Buffy", I like Buffy when it's difficult and challenging and being different. I don't like my characters easy and fun, I like them flawed and scary. 3. Fave Angel seasons: 4 2 1 3 5 I HATE season five of Angel, because it's such a mess and it's just not what the show was. When they moved into W&H I was excited, I thought "My god, this is going to be awesome", and what did we get? "Conviction" which was Law & Order with some stupid demons thrown in, bland Fred, useless Lorne, character-overhaul Gunn, obvious add-in Spike, NO CORDELIA and almost no-one actually giving a shit that she's gone. We got all these lame annoying episodes like "Life of the Party" and "The Cautionary Tale of Numero Cinco", "Unleashed" argh. Don't even get me started on Wesley telling Angel to get with Nina only TWO EPISODES after his true love died. They were trying too hard to just attract new viewers and it was horribly obvious. Too much bad comedy, not enough emotional investment. I didn't really like the new W&H sets either, they never felt very realistic. I missed the hotel. 4. I think kids are always going to want to try it and there's never going to be a complete way to stop them. I did participate in underage drinking, since I was like, 16 or so, but I was always smart about it. I made sure not to go over my limits, I never got myself into bad state. I grew up with my parents being fairly open about alcohol, they naver made it this huge forbidden thing, which meant I was never desperate to get out there and drink as much as possible. Yeah, I'm 18, and I do go out drinking with friends. Again, I'm always smart about it, I never get so bad that I puke or can't walk and stuff. I did go on holiday to Kos, where it was pretty much a booze cruise, but that's really the only time I've gone somewhere primarily to get wasted (I don't think I was fully sober for one day of that holiday). I'm quite a heavy drinker though, in the sense that it takes a long time for me to reach my limit. One of the waitresses at a bar in Kos used to be amazed at what I could put away, she'd be like "I just brought you that pint of cocktail like a minute ago, how've you finished it already?" and I'd just shrug and buy another. I don't disagree with drinking, but I don't like it when it becomes a crutch for people to have fun, you know? That always seens quite sad. 5. I do have one, but I mostly just use it to keep in touch with my friends and pass about new info and stuff. I can't stand that whole MySpace whore cultrue, where people put up like a new pic every two days and are like PLZZZ CHEK OUT MAH NEW PIXXXX COMMENTS PLZZZZ. It's so VAIN! And kind of sad too. It's like they're not getting enough attention in real life, so they have to get it online. That's not a good way to be!
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 23, 2006 10:50:10 GMT -5
I have more! 1) You are randomly given a voucher for Plastic Surgery. You have to have one proceedure, and 'nothing' or dental work is not an option. What do you go for? 2) Most embarassing CD you own? 3) Are there any celebrities, that you can imagine being really arrogant and nasty in real life? 4) Do you think Britney will make a successful comeback or do you think too much has happened for her to be that popular again? 1. Hmm. I'd get some cool cheekbones, I always envy people with really great cheekbones, they can make a face look so much more attractive, so yeah, I'd get cheekbone implants or something. 2. Spice, by the Spice Girls. But I'm sure EVERYONE owned that and loved it at some point in their life. 3. Sometimes I worry about Sarah Michelle Gellar, after reading stuff from crewmembers and things the cast have said in interviews. Everyone always refers to her as "professional" and not much else. The old stunt co-ordinator, Jeff Pruitt, said that SMG hated Sophia Crawford (her stunt double) because people threw a lot of praise Sophia's way and Sarah was unhappy with that. He said she also didn't play nicely with any of the female members of the cast, especially Charisma Carpenter and Emma Caulfield. According to him, she was quite well-known for making derogatory comments about the quality of the show and the people invloved, and one time, badmouthed a fight he was choreographing, so he turned to her and said "Well if you have something better, show me it", which is partially what led to his firing. I really hope it's not true, because I do love SMG, but when you're standing in the face of such overwhelming evidence, it becomes hard to ignore. 4. Anything can happen with the right publicity. Britney just needs to tidy herself up, get into shape, and play down her involvment with Kevin Federline, and she could make a great comeback.
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Post by Shannon on Sept 23, 2006 11:56:39 GMT -5
OMG I totally agree about MySpace! When people are like COMMENT MY NEW PICS! I dont, because I dont wanna be begged to compliment them, starving for attention! Okay Ill ask some questions now! Do you watch The Simple Life? Do you like Marvel comics? Who would you kill, Willow or Xander? Does your mother shop at Saks?
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Post by stakey on Sept 23, 2006 12:17:39 GMT -5
Which song at the mo' do you feel guilty about liking?
(mine would have to be a remix of paris hiltons stars are blind....hate the girl but the remix is so chavvy and such a laugh to dance to I cant help but like it lol)
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 23, 2006 16:02:42 GMT -5
OMG I totally agree about MySpace! When people are like COMMENT MY NEW PICS! I dont, because I dont wanna be begged to compliment them, starving for attention! Okay Ill ask some questions now! Do you watch The Simple Life? Do you like Marvel comics? Who would you kill, Willow or Xander? Does your mother shop at Saks? Exactly! It's so annoying pandering to people's vanity! 1. I've watched it a few times because I find Nicole Ritchie quite humourous, she could do quite well in comedy if she gave her princessy ways. I liked the one where Nicole got her pruse stolen on that bar and then went schizo and started screaming and then dumped a fucking bottle of BLEACH on the pool table. omfg. I laughed so hard. 2. Never read Marvel comics, comics aren't this huge part of everyone's childhood over here like they are in America, so they don't import them or sell them as widely. 3. Willow! Straight away without a doubt. I'd just be like "Goodnight bitch" and blow her away. 4. She might have, when she visited New York a Christmas or two ago, I'll ask her!
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 23, 2006 16:04:17 GMT -5
Which song at the mo' do you feel guilty about liking? (mine would have to be a remix of paris hiltons stars are blind....hate the girl but the remix is so chavvy and such a laugh to dance to I cant help but like it lol) LMFAO The song I feel most guilty for liking right now is SexyBack, because it's such an attention-grabby comeback song, but it's so great to dance to, I can't ignore it when it comes on in the clubs!
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Post by The Second Evil on Sept 23, 2006 16:13:08 GMT -5
What the heck, more random questions.
1) Who's your favourite Diva out of: Mariah Carey, Celine Dion, Cher, Whitney Housten or Diana Ross?
2) Which rapper would you most like to hit round the head with a cricket bat?
3) Is it sad that I've made a graph monitoring the fluctuating success of the Hot Seat?
4) If you started going bald at 25, would you wear a wig?
5) Is it weird for me to have a Guinea pig named La Toya?
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 23, 2006 16:31:28 GMT -5
What the heck, more random questions. 1) Who's your favourite Diva out of: Mariah Carey, Celine Dion, Cher, Whitney Housten or Diana Ross? 2) Which rapper would you most like to hit round the head with a cricket bat? 3) Is it sad that I've made a graph monitoring the fluctuating success of the Hot Seat? 4) If you started going bald at 25, would you wear a wig? 5) Is it weird for me to have a Guinea pig named La Toya? 1. I like Mariah Carey because she's clinically INSANE. She got on a flight once, covered herself in a blanket, cut a whole for her eyes and mouth, and spent the entire flight like that. CRAZY! Whitney's "crack is whack" statement is hilarious though, so that endears me to her a little. 2. Fifty Cent, he's disgusting. He has such a horrendous attitude toward women and gay people. Plus he's ugly as sin, so it'd be no real loss to the world. DIE, CENT, DIE. 3. LMFAO! Well I guess not TOO sad, I mean companies do it to monitor their own success, so it can't be too bad for you to do it to monitor your own, right? 4. No way, that always looks insanely weird and fake. I'd be paranoid about it all the time, thinking it might blow off, or someone might see my wig join. If I start going bald at 25, I'll shave my head and work the skinhead punk look. 5. A little, but that's because I find guinea pigs really unsettling to begin with. The way they squeak sort of unnerves me. Naming it La Toya's not weird though, I mean how many people have named their pet after a pop star or a movie character?
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Post by stakey on Sept 23, 2006 17:51:11 GMT -5
Which song at the mo' do you feel guilty about liking? (mine would have to be a remix of paris hiltons stars are blind....hate the girl but the remix is so chavvy and such a laugh to dance to I cant help but like it lol) LMFAO The song I feel most guilty for liking right now is SexyBack, because it's such an attention-grabby comeback song, but it's so great to dance to, I can't ignore it when it comes on in the clubs! OMGod I love sexy back ahahahaha.....I always dance to it at parties or whatever and always sing at the top of my voice and yell the YEH! part....its amazing! I heard an amazing remix today....it was Put your hands up for detroit (another amazing guilty pleasure) sexy back and then cassie Me and u.....there was a bit of SSB going on in my room....dancing and singing like a freak. Sorry realized Iv asked no questions but whatever. Ill some more later,
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Post by firecracker on Sept 23, 2006 18:51:02 GMT -5
What was it like for you growing up?
Did you endure any hardships and deprivations?
Did you ever get abused, physically or mentally?
How often did you get spanked?
Did you ever get beat with a belt?
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Post by Chosen Prophecy on Sept 24, 2006 8:04:17 GMT -5
Imm backkkk
1. Would you give a mouse a pancake?
2. Don't worry I wont continue.
3. Who is your favorite tellytubby, and if you say tinkiwinki I'm done with you
4. Buttercup Bubbles or Blossom
5. Does your eye itch right now?
6. Mine does.
7. What is on your desk that shouldn't be?
thats all because Its too early to think
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Post by Shannon on Sept 24, 2006 20:23:50 GMT -5
Do you think Firecrackers questions are creepy?
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Post by Browncoat on Sept 25, 2006 3:37:02 GMT -5
1. I live in the wonderfully disturbing and odd town of Royal Tunbridge Wells, which is in Kent. It's a spa town, and was founded because the royal family used to like coming here to paddle in the water of some kind of spring. My friend was born in tunbridge wells (and my mum was born in folkestone, and my grandparents are from hythe). Go Kent! Okay, some more questions: 1) How long could you live on a spaceship before going all crazy and reaver-like? 2) If you moved to the usa, where would you want to live? 3) If you moved to a different county in england, which would it be? 4) Worst buffy big bad? 5) Best Big Bad? 6) I can't remember if this has been asked, but favourite tv shows?
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Post by AngelAficionado on Sept 25, 2006 12:11:38 GMT -5
What was it like for you growing up? Did you endure any hardships and deprivations? Did you ever get abused, physically or mentally? How often did you get spanked? Did you ever get beat with a belt? 1. Growing up, for me, was weird and tough. My dad died of cancer when I was about six or seven, and that near enough tore my family apart. I think after that, me and my mum just stopped connecting. I don't know why, but we just...didn't have a relationship anymore. My Dad's funeral and burial caused no end of problems for the family, because my father's Irish family, who still lived over there, insisted he had to be buried in Ireland. My mum said he should be buried in the Uk, so that she and his own children could visit him often. Eventually my mum lost the fight, and my father was buried in Ireland, so in total, in my life, I think I've visited his grave like, 4 times? When my Dad died, for a while I kind of went into myself and just disconnected from everyone. I spent all my time alone and I completely severed all my ties from my friends. I used to just sit in my backyard alone, or in the woods on the tree swing there. It took a long time for me to get back to some semblance of normality. I didn't know who I was anymore or how I felt about anything. I'd always known I was gay, but back when I was really small, I didn't know there was a huge social stigma attached to it. So in my first year of primary school, I insisted that I was going to have a boyfriend when we played "Houses" and not a wife or girlfriend. Unfortunately, the kids I went to school with remembered that, and by the time I was about 9-10, having realised that being gay was socially unnacceptable, they decided to bust out the revelation that I used to talk about wanting a boyfriend. Anyway, that made things just awful for me for a good 5 years, near enough. Knowing I was gay, getting shit for it, and having to deny that I WAS gay sucked. Thank God my mum never overheard any of that stuff, because with my Dad's death, she wasn't really in a fit emotional state to know thta her son was a deviant. The weird thing was, the harder I denied being gay, the more weirdly gay my behaviour got, as if subconsciously I was trying to let the truth come out. I started becoming what I hate, which is a gay stereotype, all stupid speech and ugly clothes and stuff. As soon as I bit the bullet and just came clean, all my weird gay behaviour like, dissappated. Recently my friend Alissa actually said to me "You know, a few years ago, I could have pegged you as gay without doubt. Now, I couldn't tell whether you liked men, women or ...sheep!" It was really gratifying to hear that I was just a regular boy again. I think, from all my issues with my school years and my Dad's death and my lack of a relationship with my mum, I have a lot of trust issues and a huge fear of abandonment. I don't trust what I see, because the times I have have ended badly. I'm always looking for the catch or the flaw. I had a lot of self-esteem issues that got quickly put to bed when I discovered boyfriends and stuff, so that's at least one good thing. 2. Other than the hardships I talked about above, I don't know. It was tough when my mum got engaged, because I hate her fiance, and so living in the same house as him is extremely stressful and uncomfortable. Me and my sister don't get along either, on a level where we can't really even be around each other anymore. I don't talk to my Irish family (my Dad's side) save for a couple of cousins, because they're "disappointed" in how I turned out. Unreligious, blunt, uninterested in taking over the farming business. They think I'm wasting my time with Film and Drama and acting and stuff. I'm happpiest when I'm not around my family. I've promised myself that when I'm an adult and I'm successful, I won't let them back into my life. They were never interested before, why should I be interested then? Deprivations? Not in the material sense. I've always lived comfortably, since my Dad was pretty high up at his job at a well-known bank in London. He took out a pretty hefty life insurance poverty and that, combined with his savings, allowed us to have a pretty well-off lifestyle. 3. Abuses, omg, well looking back on those stories I told earlier about what happened to me at school with those crazy teachers Mrs Theobald and Mrs Marriot, I realise I probably was abused. I should have made a bigger fuss about it, because it would have lead to their dismissal far quicker. Mentally, I guess you could say all those years of torture about being gay were a kind of mental abuse. 4. Rarely, I was naughty ALL the time, but my mum only used smacking as her very last resort. Other than that, she'd try to just use things like "Naughty corner" or shutting me in my room. 5. Um. No.
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